In light of the pending pandemic, Hallmark just announced they were going to release and marathon some of their Christmas movies to lighten the mood. That’s adorable. That’s the last freaking thing I think I can handle right now.

To posit an alternative, let me introduce you to one of my favorite things. I’m a big fan of a very special genre I like to call “stupid-dark.” (I’m also guilty of being a fan of faux-documentary horror movies, so do with that what you will). Movies that show the less cute side of humans and/or have 5th grade creative writing level plots. There’s lots of good dark movies and shows, but the majesty of reaching a stupid-dark is unparalleled. Unexpected, bizarre, outlandish, and most importantly, distracting. That’s the stupid-dark way.

This is what I need in these trying times. I can barely handle cute Christmas Hallmark movies during the holiday season, and there’s a possibility that you’re the same way. Come join me on an adventure into Stupid-Dark. Best part, these are all on Netflix right now! Yippie!

1. Tiger King (2020)

This is brand new on Netflix and I binged it in a day (yesterday was not productive to say the least, but I, along with Joe Exotic and a plethora of weirdos of big cat breeding did very good on scrabble go while watching this so that’s something). This leans more towards Dark/Weird than truly Stupid-Dark – because it’s not stupid, it’s an incredible documentary – but there’s some things that happen that make you go “Oh god, that was stupid,” so I’m including it here. This deep dive into the lives of the big cat breeders and traders into the United States, including a Libertarian presidential campaign, accidental suicide, a man leading a harem of women tiger keepers, a potential murder plot and of course a butt ton of baby tigers and lions, is so bizarre and gripping.

Continue reading ➞ 7 “Stupid-Dark” things to watch on Netflix.